and into 2011...

I'm struggling to write anything about what I want out of 2011. 2010 was so taken up with sorting out my parents' affairs and then trying to deal with my own response to losing them that I don't really feel like I was able to do anything else for myself last year. If I rewind to how I was feeling at the end of 2009 I think I was struggling with knowing what direction I wanted to go in and so I've emerged from grief into uncertainty again :-)

I kind of hate setting goals and making resolutions but maybe that is what I need to do now. When I think about it I actually do have quite a few things I want to take forward: work projects (which I won't go into here), running (thinking of doing another 1/2 marathon), Tai Chi (I want to try a different class), trying to be a bit more social, learning more about molecular biology, doing a bit of art, finishing off the room in the roof so we can actually move in, selling mum and dad's house (finally), and maybe doing some family history or updating my moribund website.

2010 Valedictory

Christmas was quiet - I finished work a bit earlier than normal as I was feeling a bit run down from my cold. I had a drink with Ian and Clare and then we had Christmas at home as usual. The girls enjoyed getting presents, and I was pleased to see they were both keen to give presents as well, and wanted to put some thought into what they gave each other.

My brother and his family came up a couple of days later so it was good to see them again. L got on well with Megan's children, although i think E felt a bit left out. Graham and Megan's baby liked his dinosaur toy and fortunately they were able to get their car started when they went home (it had been a bit unreliable earlier in the day).

Then we had some people over for E's birthday on the 28th which was good fun. The 30th was the 1st anniversary of mum's death so I felt quite up and down throughout the day (and to be honest, throughout the holidays). I've tried to just give myself space to go out and sit quietly, or walk, but it's hard to just be with the feelings without over-reacting towards or away from them.

Since then I've been doing a few bits round the house - clearing up the garden, fixing the house number back up (taken down when the scaffolding was up), replacing the doorbell, that kind of thing. I'm still avoiding re-painting the bathroom ceiling, but I don't feel so swamped with minor bits to do now, so maybe I'll do that a bit later today.

Wedding Present

I spent most of the final weeks of 2010 being ill with assorted colds and coughs (cough still hasn't quite gone) but I did manage to do a few things, including seeing The Wedding Present at The Junction. They were doing their 20th anniversary tour of Bizarro (I think I saw them at the Corn Exchange in 92) and they did a great set, including a couple of newer songs I hadn't heard before, of which this was my favourite:

I also liked the fact that they introduced the main Bizarro playthrough with a tape loop of John Peel intros - it always brings me up short to hear his voice again, particularly as the Wedding Present era was very much around the time I was listening to his show.

November with a bump

A little catch up while I remember what I've been doing...
We've had a few days off. Last week we drove down to visit H's parents in New Malden. It was good to see them, and the girls always enjoy the visits. H and I went out to Cah Chi in the evening for fantastic Korean food. It's a small restaurant (and you have to bring your own wine) but they do really great food, and they have gas grills on all the tables where they come and cook part of the meal for you.

Saturday I went out for a run and managed to trip over a drain cover. I fell full length and scraped my knees and hands. Check out the horror show at the left.

This week we've walked the Devil's Dyke from Reach, and had lunch at the Dyke's End, which I also thoroughly recommend.

Tomorrow we're thinking about going to Aldeburgh for the day, but it depends on the weather and how organised we are to get out the house. Then Friday it's back to work.

I've also succumbed to technology - I bought a Kindle, and I'm really enjoying it. I read quite a lot of articles on the web, and I've been sending those to the Kindle via email, or using Instapaper. I have also bought a couple of books and it's very slick.

The house is on hold for this week, apart from that we've been choosing paint, carpet and curtains, which has taken a lot longer than I thought it would.

Into Autumn

Time for a quick update I think. Running is going well with the new chi running style. I haven't had any problems so far with the thin shoes which is a real surprise as I used to think that they were essential to keeping me running with good form and absorbing shock. I am definitely using my calf muscles more, but I'm not getting the tightness I was when I first started, although they do start to get tired more quickly than they used to. I haven't had any knee problems so far (touch wood).

The actual disciplines - keep body in a straight line, lift the pelvis, relax legs, lean forward, etc. are quite hard to keep doing consistently. Sometimes it seems to "click" and I can feel the forward lean while my legs almost move of their own accord, but it's very hard to do for any length of time. It's enjoyable though, and it's given me a renewed interest in running. I might see if I can find a coach for a couple of sessions in the new year maybe.

The loft extension is well underway and so far we're on schedule with no major problems. The guys have worked hard when they've been here, and from what I've seen so far (e.g. the way the side wall has been built up to match the existing brickwork) it's been done to an excellent standard. Hopefully they'll be done sometime in mid-October.

What else - thinking about maybe going away again later in the year, but we've left it a bit late now. Maybe I'll take some days off and we'll think again next year. I'm going back to Pune in November, but that's for work rather than any kind of break (although this time I'm going to stay an extra night and hopefully see a bit more of the local area).

We have a senior manager coming into our office tomorrow, so there are going to be lots of presentations, of which I'm giving one. I've got slides and I've run through it today, so I'm not too nervous, but I hope it goes well. Then on Tuesday I'm starting Tai Chi again at the Buddhist Centre, so I'm looking forward to that. Busy week anyway...

More running

I've been reading a bit more about running form - I've read more of Chi Running and Born to Run, and I feel like I have a better idea what I want now. I think barefoot itself is going to be too hard (for most of the time at any rate) so I'm going to try running in much thinner shoes - unfortunately it seems to be extremely hard to get hold of Nike Frees at the moment - even Nike Town only had 7.0s in a size 10. This morning I tried running in my Converse trainers, which worked quite well - I got a much better sense of feedback from the ground, and I ran much more midfoot. I'm currently stopping regularly to try to reset my form based on the ideas in Chi Running, so we'll see how it goes for a few weeks. So far I've not had any knee pain, but my calves are much tighter than normal, which I think shows I'm using them to absorb more energy when I put my foot down.

Barefoot Running

I knew there was something else - I'm trying to gradually convert to barefoot-style running. Well, I say that, I think what I really want is to convert to a lower-impact, less heel-strikey way of running, but I think learning to run barefoot will be a big help. So far I've managed to do five minutes or so on Parker's Piece, which is quite pleasant. I'm waiting for some Nike Frees to arrive, which should let me run on more surfaces without worrying about glass or other small, sharp things.

I've also started reading ChiRunning, which is a lot less woo than the title makes it sound. Basically, it gives techniques to use more of your core muscles while running, but the effect is similar - i.e. you end up leaning forward more, and using your body to lift the legs so you in effect run by controlled falling. But that also brings you more to the front of the foot, so it's quite complementary.

Not sure what's brought it on really - I just read a critical mass of stuff that suggests it's better for you + I think maybe I just need something new to get me interested in running again. I'm almost pleased to discover that the running shops here don't have any lightweight shoes, and give you a funny look if you ask for them. Anyway, we'll see how it goes.

Now, the game's afoot (ah, didn't even mean to make that pun) - it's time for Sherlock on TV.