and into 2011...

I'm struggling to write anything about what I want out of 2011. 2010 was so taken up with sorting out my parents' affairs and then trying to deal with my own response to losing them that I don't really feel like I was able to do anything else for myself last year. If I rewind to how I was feeling at the end of 2009 I think I was struggling with knowing what direction I wanted to go in and so I've emerged from grief into uncertainty again :-)

I kind of hate setting goals and making resolutions but maybe that is what I need to do now. When I think about it I actually do have quite a few things I want to take forward: work projects (which I won't go into here), running (thinking of doing another 1/2 marathon), Tai Chi (I want to try a different class), trying to be a bit more social, learning more about molecular biology, doing a bit of art, finishing off the room in the roof so we can actually move in, selling mum and dad's house (finally), and maybe doing some family history or updating my moribund website.

2010 Valedictory

Christmas was quiet - I finished work a bit earlier than normal as I was feeling a bit run down from my cold. I had a drink with Ian and Clare and then we had Christmas at home as usual. The girls enjoyed getting presents, and I was pleased to see they were both keen to give presents as well, and wanted to put some thought into what they gave each other.

My brother and his family came up a couple of days later so it was good to see them again. L got on well with Megan's children, although i think E felt a bit left out. Graham and Megan's baby liked his dinosaur toy and fortunately they were able to get their car started when they went home (it had been a bit unreliable earlier in the day).

Then we had some people over for E's birthday on the 28th which was good fun. The 30th was the 1st anniversary of mum's death so I felt quite up and down throughout the day (and to be honest, throughout the holidays). I've tried to just give myself space to go out and sit quietly, or walk, but it's hard to just be with the feelings without over-reacting towards or away from them.

Since then I've been doing a few bits round the house - clearing up the garden, fixing the house number back up (taken down when the scaffolding was up), replacing the doorbell, that kind of thing. I'm still avoiding re-painting the bathroom ceiling, but I don't feel so swamped with minor bits to do now, so maybe I'll do that a bit later today.

Wedding Present

I spent most of the final weeks of 2010 being ill with assorted colds and coughs (cough still hasn't quite gone) but I did manage to do a few things, including seeing The Wedding Present at The Junction. They were doing their 20th anniversary tour of Bizarro (I think I saw them at the Corn Exchange in 92) and they did a great set, including a couple of newer songs I hadn't heard before, of which this was my favourite:

I also liked the fact that they introduced the main Bizarro playthrough with a tape loop of John Peel intros - it always brings me up short to hear his voice again, particularly as the Wedding Present era was very much around the time I was listening to his show.